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The Untold Struggle of Christian Singles in the Digital Dating Age

Updated: Mar 25

In today's fast-paced world, Christian singles are diving headfirst into the realm of dating apps, challenging age-old stereotypes, and embracing new avenues to find love.

Surprisingly, a staggering 80% of 66 respondents in our recent Christian community survey endorsed dating apps as a practical solution for meeting potential partners. But what does this mean for us?


It's a wake-up call to confront the taboo topics we've been skirting around for too long. For every 5 Christian single, 4 of us have probably used, are using, or considered using dating apps.  



As the founder of Sacred Companion SG, a Christian singles community, I've noticed a lack of deep conversations around the topic of dating apps and events. It's time to shatter the silence and dive deep into the heart of the matter. Why are we hesitating? Could it be the lack of a supportive community who can understand? Or perhaps the fear of straying from our Christian values in the pursuit of love?


Here's the truth: avoiding the topic doesn't change the fact that many of us are using dating apps, have tried them, or are considering it. Pretending otherwise doesn't help anyone; in fact, going through this journey alone can leave us vulnerable to mistakes and missteps. Why should we isolate ourselves when we could be supporting one another, sharing experiences, asking questions, and learning together? Let's bring this conversation into the light and navigate these waters as a united community, keeping faith and fellowship at the heart of our journey.



As our survey shows, a significant number (75%) hold a more neutral or disagreeing stance that using dating apps is a sign of desperation and lack of faith in God's plan for finding a partner. In today's digital age, dating apps have emerged as a significant avenue for meeting new people, including potential partners.


Are Dating Apps or Events the Answer?

Based on the survey results, we've grouped the standout perks of dating apps and events into themes that really speak to us. It's not about setting them against each other; rather, it's seeing how each brings something special to our journey as Christian singles. Each has its own way of enriching our search for that meaningful connection. It's clear now, more than ever, that both avenues have something valuable to offer, adding unique layers to our experiences within our vibrant Christian community.


What do you think about the insights we've laid out in the table? We all walk away with our own stories from dating events and apps—some of us with smiles, others, maybe not so much.


It gets you thinking, doesn't it? We're all on the lookout for that special someone, but it really boils down to whether we're truly ready for what's next.


Both events and apps open the doors to meeting a potential partner. But when there's a spark of interest… are you putting your best foot forward — thinking about how you present yourself, your attitude, your communication skills?


And if we go even further beneath the surface, are you ready to peel back the layers? True dating invites us to be vulnerable, to humbly expose our authentic selves. Let's face it… at our core, we are sinful creatures. Our flaws can become even more pronounced within the closeness of a relationship. It's here, in these moments, that our need for Christ becomes crystal clear, guiding us and giving us the strength to brave the unknown waters of getting to know someone deeply.

How Can the Church Support Christian Singles in Singapore?



Christian singles in Singapore face unique challenges when it comes to dating, both in church and society. While dating apps and events offer convenience, there's often a stigma around using them, especially within the Christian community. Here are our key findings from survey responses on how churches can better support Christian singles.  


 

Despite responses from a survey indicating gaps in support for singles within churches, it's essential to recognize the numerous avenues where churches are already addressing these needs. For instance, consider the upcoming workshop on "Organic dating vs online dating" by Barker Road Methodist Church on 6 April.


Dear fellow singles, as our churches explore ways to better support us, let's reflect:

  • Are we actively engaging with the ministries and initiatives tailored for our needs?

  • Do we participate wholeheartedly, remember those who lead with prayer, and share these opportunities with others?

  • Let's gently encourage each other to embrace the support we desire.


With God's help, let us contemplate how we can contribute to and receive blessings from the support provided within our church community.


Upcoming workshop by BRMC Equip Singles Ministry



Details 

This is a Singles Workshop on "Organic Dating versus Online Dating – Navigating the pitfalls and plus-points."  


Target Audience:

Dating singles, users of dating apps, people who want to be informed about the use of dating apps eg: parents and connect group leaders are welcome to attend.  


Objective: 

This is not a dating or matchmaking event but an equipping event. Singles will learn to exercise godly wisdom in the dating scene. Speaker will share real stories of her experience in dating and as a dating practitioner. There will be time for personal sharing, role play and group interaction.  


Date: Sat 6 April 

Time: 9am to 2pm 

Venue: Barker Road Methodist Church, L2 Training Rooms

Cost: $5  


Our Speaker is Ms Grace Heng

Grace is founder of Sacred Companion SG in 2021. She is constantly on the look-out for churches and individuals who have the same passion to serve the singles and equip them. She is a Dating Practitioner. (Social Development Network) She worships at Bethel Presbyterian Church and is the Lead for Singles Ministry there. She was trained in SBC and SU. Grace was one of the invited speakers at the Global Dating Insights Conference 2023.


Workshop Synopsis: 

Session 1 

  • What can we expect from dating apps and dating agencies? 

  • What are the plus points and pit falls to dating online and dating organically? 

  • What are and how can we wise up to the pit falls of dating online? 

  • What are the areas of compatibility singles should look out for instead of focusing on looks and personal interest? 


Session 2 

  • How singles can be intentional in meeting new people and not just intent on meeting that one right person? 

  • What are some wholesome dating tips? How can we make the first move in dating? What can we expect when we try to make the first move in meeting the opposite sex? How should we approach the opposite sex? 

  • Role Play: 

    • Scenario 1 - How would you make the first move in asking someone out on a date? 

    • Scenario 2 – How would you as a parent advise your teenager who is using Dating Apps? How would you as a CG Leader advise your single CG member who is thinking of using a Dating App or join a Dating Agency? 


Schedule: 

8.30 – Light Refreshment 

9-9.15 – Welcome, Icebreaker, Worship, Opening Prayer 

9.15-10.45 – Session 1 (includes group activity, group discussion, role play, reflection) 

10.45 -11 – Break 

11-12.30 – Session 2 (includes group activity, group discussion, role play, reflection) 

12.30-1.30 – Lunch 

1.30-2pm – Q&A, Closing Prayer


Click here to register.

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